Starting Over

Starting over is something many people have to do or choose to do. This process can be painful, but only if you let it be painful. If you let it, starting over can be a freeing process.

There was a time in my life that I felt like I could not get started long enough to then have to start over again. I tried so many things only to have to ditch that plan and begin again with something new that was once again unsuccessful. Then it got to a point where nothing, not my job, my city or my home was working. I felt very much kicked to the curb. The hardest words to say were I want to come home. But I took all the courage I had to say them. I really thought moving back to my hometown without a concrete plan was a failure. I had not once in my life approached anything without a well thought out plan in place. All I had was an idea of something I might want to be my new career and a promise to myself that I would work toward a life that would build me up, not tear me down like I had let happen years before. I had so many great years in New York before things starting going slowly downhill. Before I knew it I was living in the rubble of what I had hoped my life to be.

I realize now that was not a failure. That was my transition time. Yes, it took a lot of  things breaking down including my body and my health to realize it was time to change. But I finally took the steps to work toward a better life. The last thing I wanted was to start over, once again. However, this time it worked. Often times in my business of teaching Pilates and Health Coaching, I have clients that for whatever reason it is necessary to start over. This process can be painful and frustrating if you let the past stand in your way. Comparison of one’s self from the past can have adverse effects when seen negatively. I try to remind clients that if they have done it before, they can do it again. This time will not be as hard because they have knowledge from the past they can build on. They do not have to figure out every single thing again. They at least have some helpful knowledge.

If you choose to free yourself from the negativity of the past, that is when starting over instead becomes taking the next step. That is when you can turn around and look at all the steps that got you to the place you are now. You can then appreciate those steps rather than be overwhelmed by the steps that exist in front of you.

How can you let go of the past and take the next step today?

Moving On

One by one
Getting it done
Moving forward
Moving on

After years and years
Of starting over
Over
And over again

Stuck in the doldrums
Wanting to move forward
But all movement is lost
Lost in the waves pulling me back again

But finally I caught a wave
That helped me slowly make progress
Slowly but surely
Moving toward the shore

I am almost there
I can almost count the strokes left
Finally moving forward
Moving on

Free

Throughout most of my life I have felt like I’ve had to start over. I have felt like I kept getting stuck at the beginning. I was always paying my dues and it felt like they never amounted to anything. I would give my job my all with the hope that I would be recognized and rewarded by moving up. There were some financial rewards but I was always stuck at entry level. I wondered if people would ever stop taking me for granted and taking advantage of my hard work. Once I realized that was not going to change in the career I was in I changed. I decided that if I was going to do something and be stuck, I might as well enjoy what I was doing. I thought about how to make my life work for me and I designed a life that did exactly that. Getting to that point has taken a lot of time, planning and work. I realized the other day that I am finally living that life I dreamed of plus some.

I still have some room to grow and progress to make but I no longer feel like I’m stuck at the beginning. I am not stuck at all. I feel free to be my best self. I am free to do the things I have always wanted to do but had neither the time nor the energy to do them. Sure my life is always busy, but it is so much better than being sad and stuck.

If there is something you have always wanted to do, I encourage you to explore it. I have a friend that says, “A job is not a tattoo. If you don’t like it, you don’t have to stick with it.” There is certainly fear in taking the risk of completely changing your life but there is also the possibility that things just might work out the way you want them to.

Destination

I am a Pilates Instructor and I have found that goals are incredibly important when I am teaching. Instead of just flopping about and not knowing where you are going in an exercise it’s helpful to have a destination. Whether that destination is knowing the next version of the exercise is or just how many repetitions have to be done it makes it much easier to do what is asked. It’s like having a roadmap leading you along the way rather than wandering directionless. If I know that the goal is to flow through the exercises without stopping that is going to change my workout. We often need to be reminded of where we are going even if we know it like the back of our hand. There is usually another way than the usual way that is helpful to explore.

I am at that point right now. I am taking stock of my goals and reminding myself of the goals I have accomplished. I am refreshing the goals that have yet to be met and am proud of my progress in that process. I am approaching the goals that have been harder to work on with a new mindset. Sometimes the process is recession before progression but I am working on the forward motion as much as I can. I just go back to my roadmap, changing the direction as needed but still moving forward.

It is easy to get caught up in the minutiae of life. I can easily get caught up in the minutiae of an exercise. But sometimes you need to zoom out and look at the big picture. I remind myself, I am here. I am working towards my goals. I am going to get this done even though it is not perfect. At the end of the day I will be one step closer. And then one day I am surprised when the goal is accomplished.

Is there a goal that you need to revisit? Let me know in the comments!